Fate, Death, Coincidence.

" There is no such thing as coincidence, it is all inevitability"- Yuuko, XXXholic. ( anime)

 I was watching Shrek 3 on my laptop.

I didn't actually finished watching it.

I came to a part where the froggy King Harold was dead, and his body was laid to rest. It was quite sad, the music and all. I stopped the movie, and laid there, in front of my laptop, speechless.

Death. It seems so far. Yet, it is never like that. Death is always there, lurking around, everytime, everywhere.

And it reminds me of yesterday, where me, Ain, and Dibah talked , under that tree, in yesterday's cold, windy autumn weather. What Ain said echoes in my head,

" Kalau ikutkan, aku pun nak cepat-cepat masa berlalu ini,  dah tak nak belajar, nak habis belajar dah, nak kahwin, nak ada anak, nak ada famili. Tapi, kalau fikir balik, masa itu, aku dah tua. dah nak dekat mati.."

Yesterday. A sign. I didn't notice it.

The Shrek 3. A sign. I didn't notice it. Yet.

After Isha' just now, sitting there on the prayer mat,  I suddenly remember Malaysia. Not the families, not the relatives, but all memories of my childhood, teenage life there..relatives, my friends, my schools, all people that i've known.

and death comes to my mind shortly afterwards.

Funny, i suddenly feel sad that 4 years I'll be here, perhaps that tauke cina kedai basikal whom I used to repair my bicycle when I was a child is dead. i would be sad if my nenek saudara and makcik-makcik, meninggal when I am here in NZ, and I can't do anything but just offering some prayers. I couldn't handle the thought of my friends whom I used to hang out with, passed away, when what memories that they left behind are an earnest smile and a warm meeting, " Jumpa lagi bila kamu balik Malaysia".

Remembering death after Isha' prayer tonight- a sign. I just am not aware of it.

All these thoughts I had are weird today- considering I used to be cheerful and ignorant on this kind of matter.

10 minutes ago, I know why. Why all these signs.

3 signs. And I saw the fourth sign on Facebook.

A friend of mine has passed away today in Malaysia. A friend I do know quite well, but we didn't contact each other for quite some time. And he's gone now. He has returned  to where he belongs. To Lord the Creator.

I think God sent me signs after signs today, yesterday. Maybe I got too absorbed in my life that I no longer remember that death is my most intimate friend afterall.

And so, thank you, God. Thank you for this reminder.

God bless you, my friend. Tuhan takdirkan kita tidak lagi boleh ketemu lagi. Selesailah kamu di alam sini, kami di sini akan menyusul- ianya pasti.