I Want To Live Alone, Could I?

It's hard to live together, that I know.
I was blessed with a pretty much simplistic combination of dorm mates or room mates .

In SIS the hostels were big dorms, where in a dorm there was about 30-40 students sharing twin beds. It was vibrant, lively, happening. Complete lack of privacy, but hey, we were all in the situation together. After all, those times were precious. I still remember clearly that one of my best moments in life so far were the weekend nights where we little kids ( young teenagers) slept reasonably late and we spent the whole time laughing and talking about some silly stuffs- teachers, little bits and pieces about our seniors, gossips. Those were great times- and I wouldn't mind trading all of my life right now to relive again those innocent moments, where I was still young, skinny and carefree, Budin was still chubby, Kemey are as loud as ever, Megat always been made fun of, in a good way. Then they are countless others. Some dorm mates I knew during my childhood years, some I become their enemies, some I have love-hate relationships with.  

Those guys are one of my earliest friends. I don't really have that close a friend during my childhood. I rarely go outside. I used to just watch TV in the evenings and since my house was quite far from my friends' houses, I didn't get to play often. So, meeting Budin, Kemey, Megat, Syafiq was a blessing for me. I know I messed up a lot in life, but them,  Megat, especially knows my good sides and bad sides, and in them I retain my belief in everything that would matter.

In MRSM Muadzam Shah I live in a four-bed room with two other guys. Akmal , one of them, is a very nice guy. He's tall and looks very scary, but he's actually is a very friendly and I have to add, a very intelligent guy. Last time I checked, now he's in UK studying medicine. The other guy's doing accountancy now.Me? TESOL. Wow. Nobody would expect that.

In MRSM Taiping, super great. My F4 year I had a cube mate.A cube is like a portion of a dorm when two beds are grouped together by partitions. Then the next year he transferred back to his old school. He didn't fancy boarding life, it seems. Big deal. He went to VI and that's the last thing I heard about him. I have to confess that I didn't even bother. All that he ever did were whining on how stressful MRSM life is- as if I couldn't know it myself. Therefore, my Form Five year is a 'loner' year. No cube mate. Alone. But hey, the cube doesn't have any door anyway. It's still practically a big dorm. I didn't really hang out with my old cube mate anyway all those times, I was not cool enough to be with his clique.

KMS was fine. Faizi and Hariz are cool. They might have hated me for my quirky and annoying attitude, but so far they haven't expressed it to me. I won't be surprised actually. In my senior year, Juju was amazing. It was nothing special, though. But it was fun, in many ways.

Living alone was a new thing here in Auckland- and I like it. No drama, which is a downside- but hey, life's not perfect if it's all perfect.

I have to admit , I'm not so sure about living together next year. A voice in my mind keeps telling me to be brave and just go on living alone. Less hassle. Less trouble. Living in orchard here with these people show me that I have so many problems . I lack commitment, I'm pretty much selfish, and I really need my space. I'm so used to lock myself up whenever I feel uneasy or depressed these days but it's almost impossible back here at the orchard. 12 guys crammed into one house. Sharing a pillow with Faizi. Eating and cooking together. Trying not be rude. Don't get angry unnecessarily. Unnecessarily hard.

Weird, this is exactly how Juju wrote in his blog last year, haha, the thing about living alone, LOL.

This is now my turn indeed, haha.