Friday, June 27, 2008

When There Is No Love Involved

Being who I am,I have quite a share of straight, gay and bisexual friends.No lesbians, not that I know.For gay guys, I kinda pity them. A friend of mine confessed that he is very bored of his life.
" Wan, you should be able to understand me. My life is so tiring. I long for love of a man, but till now, none has come. Semua datang memanggil kita sayang, honey, and lots of "i love u",but they are all fake. What they want is just purely sex."

" Dalam masyarakat kita pun, aku dah cukup terseksa kena live double life. Nobody understands or want to understand me"

" Kenapala all guys yang aku jumpa cuma fikirkan seks semata. Aku tak fikirkan tu sangat actually. yang penting aku ada teman yang boleh aku kongsi suka duka aku"


itulah dunia gay. gay kan maksudnya riang, keseronokan semata.i learned my lesson.

Well, bila dia cakap "you should be able to understand me", aku terkedu. Tak begitu memahami.Tidak mampu melahirkan empati .My cases are different. Aku pernah didampingi guys yang memang benar-benar mahu menyayangi, ada yang jantan celaka seperti kawan aku punya boyfriends, still, atas faktor agama, terpaksa tolak sahajala.Tambahan pula perasaan sayangkan rakan masih menebal.

Aku tidak pernah merasai dunia kawanku itu. Yes, i have been in an all-boys school, but not as extreme as him.

Shida is the one who make me realize that I am not what I think I am. So, I am really grateful for her.

Apa yang aku cuba nak sampaikan, I don't want to talk about morality or ethics here, but to my friends, sexually-related relationship is not the only way to gain "love". kenapa menyempitkannya? apakah parents ada tidak memberi anda love? kawan2 anda?yang memahami kalian?

aku juga tidak mempercayai close friendship.itu pasti.tapi aku tidaklah merasakan bahawa itu penamat hidup.life has too much to offer.

I love my friends, be it gay, straight or even dumb. It is not I agree with that, they should realize that. But, to be homophobic is not needed.

Maybe experience teach me to be like that.

No comments: